Touch: Cheating Is Natural- Women Can Do It Too
The current events surrounding Football Superstar Chad Johnson and his Reality Star wife Evelyn Lozada Johnson domestic dispute and infidelity has moved me to write this month’s article. I felt that it was only appropriate that I discuss some of the prevalent issues that seem to continuously occur within relationships: mainly cheating. For reality television it makes for great entertainment, however, in real life the effects of cheating can yield traumatic effects on those being cheated on, and in some cases even the cheater must pay the consequences. Although there is a bigger issue here with this couple regarding domestic violence, and I in no way condone abuse of any kind, I will save my views about that situation for a later time.
It has been argued for centuries that males are not built to be monogamous. During evolution the main importance of mating was to reproduce, so it was common for a man to have more than one wife or multiple mistresses to bear his children while the women remained faithful to their man. As our society has developed over the years, women have become more independent and are no longer muted by society standards set in place by men. Although, some countries and religions still operate within the institution of polygamy to this day, American culture is still fighting the nature of the beast. Our societal roles between men and women are changing, when women once use to be stay at home moms, women are now waiting until later in life to have children and focusing more on their careers. There is no doubt about it that roles are being flipped and cheating in relationships is becoming more prevalent; thus women and cheating are on the climb.
“19 percent of women and 23 percent of men reported cheating, statistics that seem to reflect a closing of the cheating gender gap. Research from the 1990s found that only about 10 percent to 15 percent of women reported being unfaithful”. Equal Opportunity Cheating: Women and Men Cheat at Same Rate www.abcnews.com
The fact is, yes men cheat more; however men and women cheat for two separate reasons. Men tend to cheat because they are not married, too many options, the need from something “strange”, utilizing sex as a stress reliever, and finally an exit out of the relationship. When it comes to women however, cheating tends to occurs for these reasons:
Women tend to have an emotional connection with the person they cheat with and are more likely to cheat because of loneliness. If there is any disconnect within a relationship and the women feels obligated to remain in it, she may go looking to feel the void elsewhere.
Just as it was in a man’s nature to have multiple wives to bear his children, female affairs may have evolutionary roots as well. Women, while looking for food would sleep with other men, creating an insurance policy in the process — to have someone who would help rear their children and provide resources should her mate die. Today it is no different, women who are materialistic may also look to a man who can provide that for her and in many cases chase after a man that is in a relationship in hopes of gaining materially, does “gold-digger” ring a bell?
Women need to feel desired by the man that they are with, and we long to be praised for how beautiful we are. When a man neglects to make his woman feel special, she may look for that attention wherever it’s being given. Woman want to feel that emotional connection with their partner, and that includes spending time with each other outside of sex, overall intimacy is what we long for.
Accidental or On Purpose
Women are also less likely than men to cheat with an excuse of “it just happened” because they tend to think longer and harder about the situation. Not saying that women purposefully want to cheat, however, we are aware of where our actions may take us if we spend too much alone time with another man.
So where does that leave us? Men and women cheat, but for different reasons, and understanding those reasons can help you prevent it. If you are in a relationship, be in the relationship 100 percent. Be attentive to the needs of your partner and nurture your relationship with intimacy. There’s a saying “A Happy wife makes for a Happy life”, keep that in mind!
Do you think that our society needs to adjust its views on infidelity and accept it as human nature both?